Aries – Congrats on graduating!
Taurus – “Lucky” by Britney Spears starts playing in the background of your life.
Gemini – Too Cool 4 School! Go off!
Cancer – If you are feeling small, fly with the chickadees for a minute.
Leo – Shoot the breeze with a dog or two.
Virgo – Your leg hair is longer than the summer.
Libra – Please wash your Nalgene water bottle.
Scorpio – All rights reserved.
Sagittarius – Anthrax, baby!
Capricorn – Asbestos, baby!
Aquarius – Ain’t no point in even shuttin’ the gate.
Pisces – The next time you see a golf cart… well, you’ll know what to do.