Female musical artists and their exes

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As a hardcore Taylor Swift fan, I’ll admit I get a little defensive when people openly don’t like her music. However much I disagree with them, though, I understand that everyone has different musical tastes. So, I won’t be arguing that everyone should love Taylor Swift. I will, however, share my opinion on why everyone should just shut up about female musical artists only writing about their exes. 

First off, literally what is the point of saying an artist only writes about her exes? I can assure you that Rihanna is not going to magically hear your opinion and change her entire musical approach. Believe it or not, these women you’re complaining about make hundreds of thousands of dollars a year and aren’t fazed by your comment. They don’t even notice you because they have such successful music careers. 

Secondly, so what if a woman writes a song about her ex? If someone screwed me over in a relationship and I was a famous musical artist I’d probably do the same thing. I don’t understand why women, famous or not, constantly need to walk on their tiptoes, dancing around what people think they should or shouldn’t do. If a woman writes a song about her ex she’s labeled as unoriginal; if she writes a song that isn’t about romance, people think she’s boring. We’re talking about music here. If you don’t like listening to an artist, just don’t. Search for something else on Spotify.  

And, by the way, if you’re criticizing something as dumb as an artist only writing about her exes, more than likely she’s not making the music for you. You clearly aren’t in her target demographic, so you’re essentially commenting on something that doesn’t even involve you, making what you think simply irrelevant. Plus, sharing your opinion about someone else’s music isn’t really going to change their fan base. People are going to like who they like, especially when it comes to the artists they listen to. Because of this, I really don’t see the point in complaining about something that doesn’t need to affect you. 

So, if you’re saying women artists only ever write about their exes, what you’re saying isn’t actually a well-thought-out opinion, it’s just a way to hate on female artists. No one is forcing you to listen to Katy Perry or Doja Cat, so if you’re just going to be misogynistic and hurtful then you might as well not say anything at all. 

Third, this isn’t even true. Female artists do write about more than just their exes. Even someone who is well-known for having more relationship-based songs, like Taylor Swift, still writes more than just break-up tunes. If you think a woman artist only sings about her exes, then I hate to break it to you, but you’re just not listening to the lyrics. If you’d like some Taylor Swift examples of this, why don’t you give “Welcome to New York,” “The Man” or “the last great american dynasty” a try. 

What makes me the most irritated, though, is that people act like female artists are the only ones to ever write songs about break-up or love. Most pop music artists write and produce songs like these, but only women get criticized for it? Break-up songs are written by everyone, so don’t act like this is all Adele, Ariana Grande or Billie Eilish’s doing. Heartbreak is such a common topic and theme in all forms of entertainment, so there really is no need to gender it. 

Women are consistently ridiculed for everything they do, no matter what direction they take. Society always says women are too much of something. Women musical artists are either too sappy or too cold-hearted. It’s impossible to reach in between this spectrum because no one is allowing for a middle point to be made. Everyone always has some opinion to share about “women are too this” or “women are too that.” Why can’t women, famous or not, just be? Why do they always have to be “something?” 

This type of labeling is exhausting and also happens outside of the music world. While I know this op-ed doesn’t have the power to completely change the course of the world, all I ask is that you simply stop giving out these types of opinions about women, whether they’re Taylor Swift, or someone in your family. Because at this point, saying things like “women only write about their exes” is just fluff. It’s not a new or original opinion, and quite frankly I’m pretty positive everyone is tired of it. 

There is already so much misogyny launched at women. Every. Single. Day. While the issues famous female artists face certainly aren’t the most detrimental, it’s still a problem. And if there’s something simple people can do to start tearing down these stereotypes, I don’t see why we shouldn’t do it. There’s a lot more to be said about misogyny not only in the music world, but in life generally. I can’t fix everything revolving around this topic, but I can suggest that people shut up. 

That being said, shut your mouth and go find something else to listen to.