Bad Lawrence Poetry #4

What if,

Notable rapper

50 cent

participated in

The Lawrence Housing Lottery?

Would he get the number


Or would he get


Questions like these,

Often overlooked at

Our institution of

“Higher education.”

He would probably end up in Brokaw.

Like the rest of us.

What if Meryl Street ate at

Andrew Commons?

Would she wince at

The cheddarwurst?

Would she feel enamored by

The unlimited soft serve?

It gets old, Meryl.

I heard Kylie Jenner has been

Hired to renovate

Kohler Hall.

She was quarantined there when she had

COVID-19, last winter.

She envisions a dorm with pizzazz.

Still no air conditioning, though.

Kylie has yet to comment on this.

Nicolas Cage received the new position of working

At the Seely G Mudd

Circulation Desk.

He is still struggling with

Inter Library Loans.

He is working hard to fix this.

What would these celebrities do

At Lawrence U?

Would they act similar to me?

Or more similar to you?