LUFFt transcends time, acronyms

I.P. Freely

The Lawrence University Forum for Free-thought (LUFFt) has declared its first annual Free-thinkers Week (FtW) a complete success despite questionable attendance.
The week, dedicated to revolutionary thinkers from the history to the present, was missed by the overwhelming majority of Lawrence students.
Due to the organization’s aversion to conformist-driven, mainstream means of advertisement such as Facebook and “flashy commercialist posters,” many students were left in the dark as to where and when the events of FtW were to have taken place.
Some students and faculty actually claimed that FtW actually didn’t happen at all.
“That’s exactly how we planned it,” claimed LUFFt founder Evan Meszaros. “Space, Time, Attendance; these are all simply social constructs that have been forced onto us by the religious right,” Meszaros explained, “and the Lawrence community needs to liberate itself from the chains of conformity that have enslaved campus events for decades.”
Ever since the group brought their little ‘t’ in front of the LUCC finance committee, LUFFt has attempted to reshape the way Lawrentians think about thinking.
“Einstein told us that time is relative,” said junior LUFFt member Stephen X. Flynn, “yet, here we are decades later and we’re still trapped in the little boxes on our day planners.”
He went on to explain that FtW may actually be happening right now, or maybe it won’t happen for another 18 million years.
“The result is the same,” X explained. “People are simply afraid to see our universe for what it really is: indifferent.”
Many students voiced their disappointment over LUFFt’s revolutionary approach to event planning.
“I think they just did a poor job of advertising and are trying to explain it away,” said junior Emily Leininger. “Maybe they can find an open-minded graphic designer or at least make a f***ing Facebook invite.”
Meszaros responded to the widespread criticism by laughing maniacally, then disappearing into a cloud of smoke.