Ask A Fifth Year: Lawrentian’s Bucket List

Evan Williams

(Drawing by Annie Raccuglia)

Dear Evan,

I have realized my days are numbered here and I want to make sure I have done everything worthwhile on campus before I leave. But I have been so distracted by working and studying most of the time that I do not know what I should do before I pass… through the archways of graduation. If only there was a list of things to do before I turn in my star key and leave Lawrence!

Respectfully,

Morgan Freeman

Mr. Freeman, thank you for your question. I also thank you for your great collection of books, diaries and movies in Plantz Hall that made my, and many a Lawrentian’s, college experience special. I especially enjoyed “The Babysitter’s Club” books. Please, someone tell me that the Morgan Freeman Memorial Library still exists!

Many of us are so busy spending our time inside the Lawrence bubble studying, performing and participating in extracurriculars that we forget to take part in interesting activities that make our college experience unique. Don’t get me wrong — trips to the VR, frat parties and dorm room parties are fun — but these are standard trappings of nearly every American’s college experience.

However, Lawrence is different and the following list of six interesting things are some that Lawrentians might like to take part in before they ride off into the sunset of College Ave. Why six? Well, I couldn’t think of ten, and five didn’t seem like enough. So there. Most of these items are actual things that I’ve either witnessed, were passed down to me through a story or that I’ve maybe even done myself or want to do before I leave in June.

1. Wake up in a snow bank

I list this one first because there is — hopefully — limited time to do this before winter ends. It doesn’t matter how you end up in a snow bank — in fact the best way is to not remember how you ended up there — but you should wake up in one.

Of course, it may seem that I’m advocating irresponsible drinking, but that’s just not true. I’m sure you Lawrentians can think of many creative ways to find yourself in a mound of snow without knowledge of how you got there. Perhaps after a long night in Mudd, or after taking an antihistamine — or another medication that includes drowsiness as a symptom — and going for a nice winter stroll. Whatever it is, if you wake up in a snow bank, you know it was a fun night.

2. Have a romantic experience in the Memorial Chapel

I’ll let you determine what you consider to be a “romantic experience.” For some it might be a marriage, a kiss, losing yourself in a Tchaikovsky or Mahler symphony — capital “R” Romantic. Or it might be something else… requiring fewer items of clothing.

3. Participate in a Flash mob on campus

Ever since I saw my first flash mob video on YouTube, I’ve wanted to be a part of one. I want someone to stage a cool flash mob and put it on YouTube before I graduate. You can also substitute this with going around and interrupting campus activities shirtless and with long hair, playing the saxophone part to George Michael’s “Careless Whisper” — look it up.

4. Party Like a Rockstar on the Kohler roof

I know the words “Party Like a Rockstar” and “Kohler” normally do not go together, but I’ve heard rumors of people either finding their way or being let onto the Kohler roof to take part in shenanigans. I am very interested in taking part in such shenanigans.

5. Talk to Nick Keelan, Associate Professor of Trombone

It doesn’t matter if you play trombone, or even are a musician, but before you leave Lawrence, find a reason to talk to this Arkansan gentleman. Suggested topics include beer, planes, wives, “bullshot,” politics and life in general.

6. Find a way into the Main Hall copula

The last two pages of the most recent Lawrence Today includes a beautiful picture of the inside of the copula at twilight. Names of Lawrentians and their class years are carved all over the wood. I’ve never been up there and would love to go. Hint to anyone with power and access that would be willing to take me up there: Proposing to me is optional.

There are probably many more, but the great thing about a bucket list is that it should be personalized. Think of some things you’d like to do, and do them. Or just play your LU career by ear and remember the awesome things you’ve done that you may not be comfortable telling your parents or future children about. Pictures and videos are optional. 

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