Excerpts from an overactive imagination.
SCENE: Whole Foods store. Relatively empty, Lorraine is pushing a cart around as MATT follows.
MATT: Whining Why did you wake me up for this?
LORRAINE ignores him.
MATT: It’s 8 o’clock in the morning, Lor. Why did you wake me up for this?
LORRAINE: Matthew, I will castrate you.
MATT purses his lips.
LORRAINE: You don’t have any food. You know you don’t have any food. She turns to face him Why don’t you have any food?
MATT: Shrugging You have food.
LORRAINE: No, I don’t have food. You ate my food, Matthew. She turns away and grabs something off the shelf So now you’re buying your own.
MATT: Oh, why didn’t you say that before?
LORRAINE rolls her eyes.
MATT: Hey! Wait, how am I gonna buy this? I don’t have any money.
LORRAINE: That’s not my problem, Matthew. I have jobs lined up for you, but you’re too chicken to take them.
LORRAINE gasps and ducks behind a soup display.
MATT: What are you doing, Lorraine?
LORRAINE: *Whispering as she spider-walks behind MATT Did he see me?
MATT: Did who? What, Lorraine? He scans the store
LORRAINE: Hitting his leg Shhh, don’t look!
MATT: Shh? Raine, what is wrong with you?
LORRAINE: Nothing. Let’s go… check out! Let’s check out.
LORRAINE crawls back down the aisle as MATT looks on with exasperation.
MATT: Raine, I am not walking out of here with you crawling like that.
LORRAINE: Come on, Matthew. We just have to go!
MATT: The cart is still empty, though.
LORRAINE: Ah, well, we can come back later.
MATT: Hmm, I have never seen you this nervous before.
LORRAINE: You’ve known me for, like, two months.
LORRAINE: Same difference.
LORRAINE: Stops crawling What?
MATT: Hello, Ian.
LORRAINE scrambles to get up and leans against a shelf.
IAN: Hey, Matt. Lorraine.
LORRAINE: Hiya! We were just leaving.
IAN: Oh. Uh, bye, I guess.
MATT: Actually, we need a few more things, right Lorraine?
LORRAINE: Nope, I said we were just leaving. Ten seconds ago. That statement still stands.
MATT: How about I go grab it, and you keep Ian company.
MATT: I’ll be right back.
IAN: So, how ha-
LORRAINE: Matt was wrong. I have to go. See you later.
She walks away quickly, exiting the store.
IAN: Okay, then. Guess I’ll continue shopping.