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luther abel

Luther Abel·
Opinions & Editorials
·April 30, 2021

What in the World: Fight for fifteen’s folly

The recent push on campus to make the minimum wage $15 is well-intentioned but misguided. It may not shock the good readers of The Lawrentian that I would be of this opinion, seeing as I’m purportedly a conservative shill for capitalism. This is undeniably true — the “I Heart the Koch Brothers” t-shirt in my dresser proves it — but I’m here to win hearts and minds for my corporate overlords, not rain on good-hearted folks’ parade. Thus, I’ll refrain from wailing,
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Luther Abel·
Opinions & Editorials
·April 16, 2021

The Prius: An icon of conservatism

Commuters are rarely provided wondrous vistas during their daily drives, and this day was no exception. At the red-light on the corner of Wisconsin and Bluemound roads, adjacent to the Fleet Farm but just short of making out the Kwik Trip gas station, a traveler has little recourse but to observe the vehicles surrounding them to pass the time. After all, a red light stays red longer if you watch it, or so grandmothers are apt to say.
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Luther Abel·
Opinions & Editorials
·February 19, 2021

What in the World: The perfect reading nook

The perfect reading nook exists, I am sure of it. I am sure of it because I have experienced this nirvana personally, and, let me tell you, it feels as if one is supping from the very cup used during the Last Supper — provided you choose the correct chalice, of course. While many have explored this path before, searching for superiority in literary comfort, and found naught but personal ruin and destruction, the recipe for peak hard- or soft-cover consumption is quite simple. One only needs a plush wingback chair, a warm fire, a crossing of one’s legs just so and a purring cat upon the lap or a snoozing dog upon the feet.
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Luther Abel·
Opinions & EditorialsUncategorized
·January 29, 2021

What in the World: The importance of packaging

It was time for lunch. Having just attended back-to-back classes in the morning, I was feverish with anticipation. My lunch...
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Luther Abel·
Opinions & Editorials
·January 15, 2021

What in the World: For whom the bell tolls

It is heartwarming to see the Left denouncing mob violence against federal buildings and their inhabitants. Seven months later than...
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Luther Abel·
Opinions & Editorials
·April 23, 2021

What in the World: The Left’s infatuation with Harry Potter

The Progressive Left adores Harry Potter, analogizing nigh endlessly from the books and it is easy to see why. Open-carrying deadly weapons, a select subset of children attend a highly traditional and successful private school with barely a speck of government oversight. These lucky few inhabit an exceptional realm cut off from the rest of the world by a physical wall, lest those from the outside wish to share in the benefits of a magical society.
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Luther Abel·
Opinions & Editorials
·February 26, 2021

What in the World: In defense of decaf coffee

There are few substances on Earth more maligned than decaffeinated coffee, and I cannot understand why. Decaf is hot, it is brown and it tastes like milquetoast regular coffee. None of these three characteristics seem worthy of remark, let alone opprobrium, from the masses. But search the wide world of memes — grant you mostly of the Boomer variety — and one would think that decaf was personally responsible for: the dissolution of Vine, the live-action depiction of "Eragon" and the invasions of Poland over the last 800 years.
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Luther Abel·
Opinions & Editorials
·February 5, 2021

What in the World: Hate speeches on the beeches

The opinions expressed in The Lawrentian are those of the students, faculty and community members who wrote them. All facts...
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Luther Abel·
Opinions & Editorials
·January 22, 2021

What in the World: Utopic Joe

By the time you read this column, Joe Biden will presumably have been sworn in as the 46th president of...
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Luther Abel·
Opinions & Editorials
·November 13, 2020

Oh, the places you’ll go, Joe

     Before I get into this article, I’d like to congratulate you on making it to the end of...
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The Latest

  • Junior Faith Onukaogu wins The Pitch
    by Madeline Forman
    May 30, 2025
  • Lawrence hosts annual Unity Fest with cultural performances and events
    by Evan Portzline
    May 30, 2025
  • Out Fitting! but it’s brat
    by Lizzy Pantoga-Montoto
    May 30, 2025
  • Double it and give it to the next person: Should drivers be allowed to compete in the Indy 500 and Coca Cola 600?
    by Benjamin Hoppe
    May 30, 2025

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