Lies and Untruths

Peter Gillette

As we all know, newspapers are serious things, especially newspaper editorial sections. These pages are where Great Minds ponder Great Issues and spark Serious Debate about Important Topics. But what topic is more important than food?
Sure, every once in a great while a student will gripe about this or that that’s wrong with Downer, but these gripes are often unfounded sublimations of general discontent. At Lawrence, and in The Lawrentian, food is something that is complained about, not celebrated.
But as the editorials section grows increasingly touchy and tense, I, too, would rather generate more heat than light – heat from a Stuc’s pizza oven, that is.
Stuc’s Pizza doesn’t deliver. It’s not quite within walking distance, and it will stuff you so full of pastry, tomato and chosen toppings that the walk home might become a challenge; but it is, simply, worth buying a car.
The dcor is nothing fancy. With white and red tabletops and smooth jazz in the background, it might seem like a restaurant where a misunderstanding could take place during an episode of “Three’s Company.”
But don’t misunderstand this: it is, without a doubt, the best pizza in town. Also, the servers are unbelievably friendly. It’s impossible not to enjoy yourself there, unless you go when you’re really sick or something.
I never really forget about Stuc’s, but since it tends to take a lot of effort to get there, it becomes a special event in my life, like going to a Cubs game or the christening of a niece or something like that. I think of big performances I’ve had, bonding experiences with the trumpet studio, family time, friend time . it’s hard to have a bad time when you’re at Stuc’s Pizza.
Maybe I shouldn’t go any more often than I do. It’s always a surprise to taste real tomato and real pastry in the deep dish pizza pie, to feel the mozzarella unbroken from my plate to the back of my tongue, to spy the calzone on my girlfriend’s plate before I realize, with devilish glee, that she’s a skinny girl and there’s no possible way she can finish it by herself.
And the music is so bad in Stuc’s that you’re bound to have good conversation. Life begins and ends with Stuc’s. Muncheez and Sal’s do their own thing and Sammy’s – isn’t it gone? It was always too greasy.
No, my friends, getting to Stuc’s, which is located on West College past Family Video, may seem daunting due to the many detours, but you, my readers, will be let in on a little secret. Grab your bike and get on Lawrence Street, by the YMCA. Take it past Richmond, past Memorial, past Badger, and then turn right after awhile. You pass all of the construction! You seat yourself and await the birth of a beautiful, tasty memory. Memories and leftovers.

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