Formal apology by Yuais

Dearest campus community,
You may not be aware, but we, the Yuai Community, have badly wronged you. We would like to extend our deepest apologies to all of you.
The night of Tuesday, Jan. 29, something terrible happened. While the Yuai Community was holding its weekly meeting in the Game Room in the Student Union, two members of our organization committed an act of unconscionable vandalism and violence towards campus property, the likes of which J-Board had never dealt with before.
When one individual spontaneously decided to recline upon the billiards table, another individual used a piece of the billiards chalk to trace an outline around the prone form. When the former individual arose from the table, what seemed to some to be a “comical” picture remained.
However, the Yuai Community has become very much aware that this picture was not only not comical, but also terribly disrespectful towards the Lawrence Community. To deface a billiards table, as stained, un-level and neglected as it may be, is a terrible crime against the very ideals of liberal arts education.
Therefore, we, the Yuai Community, extend this formal apology to the entire Lawrence campus.

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