Ramble on the roof

Torrin Thatcher

With Halloween fast approaching, I have only given slight consideration as to what to dress up as for the special Saturday occasion. If I wanted to be scary, I could dress up as Shaun Livingston’s knee, Shaq’s free-throw percentage, Charles Barkley’s golf swing or Jeff Suppan’s salary. Seeing that it would be difficult to dress up as one of those unless I made a giant “52.8” outfit, I’ll just remind myself of scary moments in sports.
Knowing that there are so many intense emotions involved in routine sports viewing, I don’t want to dabble in scary moments in sports, but rather moments where I scare others while watching sports. Erupting in joy or shouting at the screen can scare others – I know because I’ve experienced it.
No slumber is safe when a game is on. This past Saturday, I flipped on the Yankees-Angels game after my girlfriend and I had our fill at Apollon. Shortly after, she got sleepy and fell asleep on me while on the couch during the game.
I tried to remain silent for much of the game so she could get her rest, but once Alex Rodriguez smacked that 0-2 fastball over the wall, I could not help but make a noise that made her rise from golden slumber. I didn’t intend to disturb her, but I couldn’t contain myself – excitement overcame me. I’ve also awoken my snoozing yellow lab, Boomer on occasion, but I know that he at least appreciates the sports updates.
When you’re drinking coffee and reading the newspaper, be wary of the quiet sports fan lurking in the corner. This past summer while back home in the grand town of Whitewater, I made my way to the SweetSpot to do some studying and smoothie sipping. This afternoon, however, was the day Mark Buehrle decided to toss a gem versus the Rays of Tampa Bay. I sneakily switched the television station from boring-ass CNN to ESPN to catch the last few innings.
I was respectful to the public and left the television on mute, but when Dewayne Wise made the play of the year to secure the perfect game in the ninth inning, I leapt from my seat, yelled, and asked everyone if they just saw what had happened.
A few people looked at me in shock and asked why I had just yelled. I pointed toward the television, and once a few people realized it was sports-related, they turned away. I did hear a girl – who I’m assuming was with her boyfriend – ask, “What is a perfect game?” He explained it, but he didn’t explain it well, so I jumped in. I don’t reserve myself around strangers. Great sports moments can happen anywhere, anytime.
To get into the playoffs in 2003, the Packers needed to beat the Broncos, and the Vikings needed to lose to the Cardinals on the final week of the season. The Packers manhandled the Broncos at Lambeau, and all eyes were on the game in the desert. The Cardinals had three wins on the year and it seemed like the Vikings would be able to handle the Cards easily.
Much to my – and every other Pack fan’s glee – Josh McCown threw a 28-yard touchdown to Nate Poole in the corner of the end zone with no time left to cement one of the most memorable plays in Packer fan history. The play stood after review, Lambeau Field erupted in excitement and the Packers made it into the second round of the playoffs.
We don’t like to remember how this season ended though – let’s not mention “fourth and 26.” Last I read, Freddie Mitchell is being sued for not making payments on a business he purchased – serves him right.
Get the Paul Bunyan Ax. After having Minnesota run for over 400 yards, all we Badgers fans assumed chances of victory were slim when we needed to put up a defensive stand. We stood tall, and the Gophers lined up to punt. Amazingly, the punter mishandled the snapped ball, and when he tried to boot it, it was blocked and recovered in the end zone to give the Badgers a four-point advantage after the PAT with 30 seconds.
The Gophers fumbled the kick return, and that was all she wrote. When Jonathan Casillas blocked that punt and Ben Strickland jumped on it for six points, all my friends and I started running around the house screaming and yelling. My mom was outside doing work in the yard and swept in through the door to see what all the noise was about as she was worried why boys would be making no much noise on a Saturday afternoon.