Ramble on the roof

Torrin Thatcher

I tend to judge people who base their vocabulary on things they pick up from the internet. In this age, it’s not rare to hear someone say “ef my life,” “epic fail” or something picked up from another site. When I come across someone on Facebook using these lines, I usually call them out on it.
Shoot, one person I hung out with for a night said “ef my life” so many times that I basically left the bar when she went to use the restroom … but I digress. Today, I won’t rip on those of you who use those words, because I just have to inform you of the epic win I had on the couch this weekend.
Friday night featured Alex Rodriguez beginning to sneak out of the doghouse. It may have taken a few years and few very poor playoff appearances, but it appears that A-Rod is finally earning his ridiculous salary – $33 million for this year alone. With six runs knocked in during the ALDS to go along with his game-tying shot against the formidable Joe Nathan, A-Rod is beginning to shake his postseason demons.
If he keeps up this success, people may forget how useless he was the last handful of postseasons. If they win a ring this year, is he completely forgiven? Possibly, but we’ll just have to see how it all works out. If he hits bombs instead of bombing like he has, then the Bronx may get another ring.
Saturday gave me a chance to dive completely into college ball. I had the intention of getting some work done while on the couch, but after watching the Badgers fail to win in Columbus for the umpteenth time, I just didn’t have the desire to have my nose in pages of work.
Fortunately for me, I had the willpower to keep the TV – and my comfy pants – on and continued my weekend ways. I had an internal countdown going until the Florida-LSU matchup, and I was reveling in all the highlights and box scores streaming from my laptop. I was awed by Freddie Barnes of Bowling Green’s 22 grabs for 278 yards, UW-Whitewater’s Levell Coppage rushing for 382 yards on 41 carries, and so much more.
While I was mostly watching the pigskin, I also took the time to wish a kind farewell to the Cardinals of St. Louis and to continuously feel sick about the Matt Holliday fielding gaffe that cost them Game 2. When I was asked when I was going out with my boys that night, I replied that I already had my boys with me: the SportsCenter anchors.
Sunday was a tale for the ages. Because of my self-inflicted unproductive Saturday, I forced myself to do get stuff done. I ate some lunch and found my little black couch with my mound of materials. I took a peek at the clock, saw 11:30, and knew that work or no work, a grand day was in store for me.
First of all, I got my work done, and then, the next 12-and-a-half hours were awesome. Sports fans saw Vikings punish the Rams, a winning team’s quarterback complete a grand total of two passes, Dré Bly make a fool of himself, Miles Austin make the Chiefs wish they could tackle, the Bengals knock off the Ravens, a guy busts open his own forehead before the game, and a couple of Mannings absolutely dissecting defenses.
Oh yeah, wasn’t there baseball Sunday too? That is correct, sir. And I was so happy once the broom got swept across the dirt at Fenway to bring about the tears of “Red Sox Nation” – which is, by the way, one of the dumbest monikers out there. I also became full of glee once the Yankees put down the men of the Metrodome in Minneapolis, and I got quite tired staying up past one in the morning to watch Brad Lidge close the tab on the Rockies.
To end my epic three-day stretch of sports, I followed the Dolphins-Jets football game Monday. We saw the newly acquired Braylon Edwards snagging balls, Ricky and Ronnie running the rock from the wildcat, Chad Henne impressing and five touchdowns scored in the fourth quarter alone.
Actually, this was the first time in history that five go-ahead touchdowns were scored in the final quarter. That should definitely make a game interesting, huh? I mean, what could have possibly topped Marc Anthony rocking the national anthem?

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